Tanguillo de Embarrassment

I was thinking this morning about embarrassing moments. It seems like everyone can easily recall the most embarrassing moment in their life, but I usually struggle with it. This is probably because I do a lot of ridiculous things, so that in the scheme of things, truly embarrassing moments don't rate that much higher on the richter scale of "WHY DID I JUST DO THAT?!" than the regular day to day.

However, a few did come to mind as I made my way into the office. My iPod was set to shuffle, and the song I learned flamenco choreography to while studying abroad came on. Flashback three years (almost four years now, holy eff!) to Italy. My flamenco class has to perform, like, in front of people, for our final. I am terrified.

I do not handle public anything well. As a kid I kicked some righteous arse at it. I took dance class til I was five or six, and at all my recitals I'd be trying to corral the other girls into doing the moves we learned and quit-picking-sequins-off-the-floor-damnit! Basically, I was bossy, but I clearly also wasn't afraid of the stage.

I am now. Like...a lot. Shame really, because I look good in a tutu.

Anyway, we go to the stage we'll be performing on to practice. We have one dance we learned and would be performing as a class, then we had also had choreography we created as smaller groups for a project which we would also be performing. As my small group goes through our choreography, the rest of the class watches from the audience. After we finish and I'm feeling all proud that I neither messed up nor vomitted, a girl in my class comes up to me and, in front of the rest of the class, says, "Sarah, you may want to, uhm...wear spanx or, or something for tomorrow night..."

I what? Why would OH MY GOD I DIDN'T SHAVE MY BIKINI LINE!

I hadn't for pretty much the full four months I'd been there. It was fall and kind of chilly, so whose going to be seeing down there anyway, right??

Ruh-roh!

Honestly, I am grateful she told me. As mortifying as that encounter was (shit! shit! I can't believe they ALL saw my fuzzy-wuzzy bikini line!), it's better then, than when the entire auditorium was full to the brim with strange people.

The worst is that, if she noticied it, it was pretty bad, or else the entire exchange never would have happened. Stage lights are awfully unforgiving. Especially when they're shining right on your exposed thighs. Oi. Thinking of it now I still die a little. But it's past, and now I will never forget to do a little maintenence before lifting my skirt in front of an audience.

This is my class as a whole, performing to "Tanguillo de Cadiz." You can't really see me (I'm in the back and then switch to the middle), thankfully. I think my teacher took pity on me and placed me at the back on purpose. Especially when she realized vom would've been really hard to clean out of the wooden floorboards had I been placed up front. Wise woman.