Friday, June 11, 2010

Whoomp there it is!

Forget my last post. Who needs a real job when I can jump on the stupid-sching-people-will-buy bandwagon!

My dear friend was kind enough to introduce me to these beauties...

Before:                                                 










After:










What are these, you ask? Oh, well, they're crotch shots of ladies...well, crotches! Let's play a game, shall we? I recall something of the sort from Highlights magazine and Sesame Street. Can you find the one difference between these two photos? Look closely...that's it...yep, you're getting warmer...aha! You got it! The disappearing camel toe! Viola! And all thanks to Camelflage panties!

Sigh. Let's be honest, I cringe as much as the next person when I am visually assaulted by public C-toe, but honestly? Is it too much to ask that maybe, maybe people just start wearing pants that fit and aren't three sizes too small? Oh, wait, what's that? It is too much to ask? Well, pardon me!

This isn't the only underwear offender. The padded panties, or rump rounders (as I like to call them), are ridiculous inventions that I almost can't believe ever were invented at all:


These are two prime examples of, well junk. One puts more junk in your trunk, and the other helps you pretend that you don't actually have any junk at all. So, it seems to me, that if I can just come up with some new and improved take on junk, I could make my fortune!

Hmm, it seems the ladies are covered (for now!).Perhaps something for the gents? What about all those plumbers who are fit and trim, and own belts? They must be mocked by others in their profession for lacking crack. Maybe, for these fanny shy lads, I could make Y-backs instead of Y-fronts! Genius!


Tada!


I sense a hit here, folks! Wealth and fortune, here I come!

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You Sass Like You Breathe by Sarah Linnell is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
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